Things haven’t really changed…

In the last week I have had some conversations with a four men single and married and come to realize that things have not really changed! I asked a few simple questions (they all know I write a parent blog and have read it) and I didn’t ask any other dad bloggers because I wanted the see the reactions and the answers from men that are not part of the blogging world.

The answers I am providing below are just an overall consensus of the answers I was given… surprising to me they all ended up at the same conclusion with different words, but the same answers. I didn’t try and discuss with them as I didn’t want to pollute the answers that were given to me.

  1. Would you stay at home with the kids if the opportunity was given to you? I was quite shocked this day in age at the answers I received. Overall the answers were no only if I had too would I! When I asked why? the answers were simple… I couldn’t do it! Staying home with the kids I couldn’t do it as I need my time!
  2. Would you or do you have expectations of your wife/girlfriend if she was or does stay at home? This one really surprised me as they all expected for everything to be done for them i.e. cooking, cleaning you know the drill! when I asked why? Because I go to work and bring the money home, I am tired and think because that’s her job as I go to mine.
  3. What if your wife/girlfriend was to go to work because she needed her time out of the house? This answer shocked me the most! I would still expect the things in the house to be done because she’s making a choice to go to work!

So as not to pollute your answers I am not going to go on about my thoughts on the answers I was given. I want to hear from the rest of you! You can answer the questions I posed to these men or you can give me your thoughts on the answers I had received from them. I am writing another post with my thoughts on this!

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omgitsagirl2015

I’m amazed Rod. Where did you find these Neanderthals??
I feel sorry for the married mans wife if that is his attitude.
What age were these guys?

I admit my decision to become a SAHD was out of my hands, but since day one I’ve always helped around the house. Some chores I’m nkt so keen on but I still helped out.

Confessions Of An Irish Mammy

Wow. 😳 I’m the stay at home parent 7 and a half years now. It wasn’t necessarily the plan, just how it worked out. Now, as the SAHP I’m happy to stick on the washes and hoover etc and my husband has an extremely busy job. That being said, when he comes home he’s not “finished work” and neither am I. We’re both full time parents and if he’s home by dinner time he’ll tidy up the kitchen or go get the boys ready for bed while I tidy up. At the weekend he generally cooks because he knows I’m fed up cooking all week. He does what he can to make my job a little less hard, like bringing the bins out on his way out the door, little things. I wouldn’t accept that 1940’s housewife attitude and he wouldn’t think that way either. It’s a team effort in this house thankfully 🙂

DadvWorld

WHAT?!?! It’s men like this that give us all a bad name. Far too many people are narrow minded in such a wide world. If in 2016 your relationship isn’t 50/50 in whichever way you determine it to be, then one of you is getting a rough deal!

Karen Bolton

Am I the only person not surprised by this?! I guess it’s all down to personal experience, but in my experience I’ve always done everything and always will. I think it would be weird for me to be around a spouse / husband that offered to do these things!!

rgemom

Just wow. Wow. Really? Are we stuck in the 50’s? I have been a stay-at-home mom the last seven years, just taking on a part-time, mostly-from-home job this past January. I do a majority of the work to take care of the house and kids, but my husband does his share as well. He never told me he “expected me” to take care of laundry, cooking (he cooks every Sunday night and often other nights as well), carpools, dishes, grocery shopping, etc. I probably would’ve slugged him if he did. He’s very aware, and frequently thanks me for, all the work I do.

Sunit Suchdev

Holy shit I feel sorry for their wives! My hubby HATES going back to work on Mondays and is jealous that I get to stay home with the kids. If he could flip it around he would in a heartbeat. I actually don’t mind doing my share of the housework because I appreciate how hard he works all day- I don’t WANT him to have to think about anything to do at home- but i have busy days too and if he comes home to a disaster and no food- he pours me a glass of wine and starts cooking. And when I worked outside of the home? He was a suppprtive rockstar who did it all right along side me. The problem with these men you interviewed is exactly why I’m so passionate about what I do which is encourage parents to think about what kinds of adults they are putting into the world and parent them accordingly! It’s clear that my husband is a by-product of his parents’ relationship, example, and coaching. Unfortunately, that generational “type” of guy you interviewed still exists. It’s up to us to be raising great men who are the norm not the exception.

Relentlesslypurple

Wow.. Unfortunately I’m not shocked. People think my Mr is weird because he’s chosen to stay home and help me whilst I’m struggling to manage my chronic pain etc and he does all the school runs, shopping, cooking, hoovering, clothes washing. My jobs are the dishes, putting clothes away & bathing the girls once he’s helped them in and doing the general organising of things.. Minus clothes washing & school runs he still did the rest whilst working too. It really annoys me people think it’s so odd and saddens me to think most women have to put up with this kind of attitude.

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