Last week as I was driving Ryley to summer school, myself I was still in a bit of a morning daze, music turned up a bit not really paying attention to much as I was a bit lost in my own thoughts at that moment. Ryley pipes up “I wonder how I can make money off it?” A bit bewildered I ask “What?” he says “The Pokemon meet up in Stanley Park” and of course I just say “Oh ok… I have no idea?”.
A minute or two later he pipes up “Maybe I can sell pop?”… Well what I heard in my daze and confusion was “Maybe I can sell pot?”… Now depending on my mood at the moment I could go either way with what I thought he said! I could go off or I could be calm. One thing I have learned as a dad to teens is blowing up doesn’t help the situation and tends to only aggravate it more. so at that moment I chose to stay calm.
Now if you really want to know my thoughts at that moment they were something like this… “What the fuck did he just say?” “What the hell is he thinking?” “Doesn’t he realize he can fuck up everything he’s worked so hard for with University coming in a year?”! true thoughts unedited (good thing I kept that rant down deep).
So instead of going on a rant I calmly started to ask questions (I’ve found it best if I bring them to realization by making them think about all the angles… Teen parenting 101). So I asked ” What about the police?” Ryley looks at me in complete confusion and answers “So they ask me to leave?” as he said that my honest thought was “What the hell?” so I asked again “Yeah the police… What happens if you get caught?” he looks at me and says to me “I’m underage what are they going to do?”.
Now if you can imagine I was literally wide eyed and paying attention at this point and said to Ryley “just because your 17 does not mean they won’t arrest you and charge you!” he looks at me with the most bizarre look and asks me “Why they would charge me for selling pop?” and ask he asked that a moment of clarity and understanding of what he was talking about washed over me. I started to laugh and said to him “I thought you said pot not pop and you scared the shit out of me!” he laughed and said we were having two very different conversations then dad, I would never sell pot!”. I then turned to Ryley before he was about to get out and said “That sounds like a good idea!” Meanwhile inside I thought “I have good kids!”
So my lesson I learned from this… If I think I misunderstood what was being said ask to hear it again and pay better attention when they talk!